New State Law Rolled out to Provide Loser-Affirming Care to All Qualified Fuckups
April 11, 2022 New York, NY Throngs of pathetic, do-nothing dipshits gathered today around brunch time at New York City Hall to celebrate...
A Message to Teens : Exchanging Eyeballs is Bad for You
It's been happening all over the country as local hospitals struggle to keep up with the trendy but horrific aftermath of this new fad.
Gluten Monster Terrorizes Hollywood
"This gluten monster issue is just too risky to try to stop with our local law enforcement as it currently stands," commented poli
Mormon Family To Give Out Pamphlets This Halloween
"I don't think it's fair to Satan," commented neighborhood Satanist Gravefilth Bloodsorrow (Likely a moniker), "I mea
It's Official: Rectum Is A Funny Word.
I was late to work this morning because my rectum broke down. It must have blown a gasket or something because there was oil all over the ro
Source of Random Itchiness Finally Discovered!
What the hell was that? What just happened? What could itch like crazy in such a tiny spot for a split second and then vanish? Your mind rac